Looks matter to women because looks matter to everyone. But what if you’re not “traditionally good looking”?

In fact, how did a skinny Asian kid like me end up dating models? This may sound overly simple, but I mastered the 8 Style Attraction Switches.

These attraction switches are based on female to male attraction dynamics I’ve discovered over the years and how they can be triggered by your style and image.

Of course, if you’re already tall, decent looking and have some style sense, you’ll go even further by reading this post. But even if you’re physically average or below average or a pimple-faced nerd like I was, it still gives you a huge head start in the dating game. These Style Attraction Switches (SAS for short hereon) have been used by over 300 men over 6 countries, ages 18-47 so we know they work.

#1. Dominance

Dominance refers to the level of passive power and forward moving energy a man has. (Not to be confused with antagonistic energy or overconfidence). Through his style, the man can convey dominance. Dominance evolved from cavemen being hunters. Their daily hunting activities ensured a strong upper body for throwing spears and a strong lower body for running and stabilization. They accessorize with parts of their prey and carry weapons and knives to assist them with the hunt. In modern humans, dominance can be expressed through clothing, behavior patterns and energy.

The dominant feeling a man is communicating to women is:

  • I knows that I want out of life.
  • I’m not afraid to express myself.
  • I am on a path of a worthwhile mission. Watch me

Dominance is expressed in clothing by:

  • First, having distinctive style. Not being afraid to stand out and actually enjoying the dominant energy in a room
  • By wearing bold colors that others may not wear
  • By moving and behaving like a dominant male within a social group
  • Clothing pieces that signify power and edginess: ties, wristbands, rings
  • Slick hairstyles and piercings also signify dominance
Matador at Princeton University

#2 Elite-ness

Elite-ness is the communication that you are pre-qualified and part of a higher social hierarchy. As such, it alludes to the fact that you have access to resources that other may not have. It also signals that you are from a wealthy or otherwise selective group. Even if you are not, you can convey that you are part of a movement to move up in the social hierarchy instead of someone who settles or complains about his place in life.The feeling the man is communicating to women is:

  • I belong to a very unique tribe.
  • I have worked hard or exhibited a higher than average skill to get to where I am
  • I has access to wealth, connections, resources or things the average person may not have
  • I understand and can communicate with people on a deeper level by “getting it” (subtle fashion differences between the elite and already decent looking)

Elite-ness is expressed in clothing by:

  • Wearing something that signals you belong to a group. A high class business suit, a salsa dancer’s uniform, or even a Giants jersey all communicate this. “Hey, I am a giant fan!” is better than “I’m nobody”
  • Subtle displays of wealth (a nice watch, or a clean, pressed suit)
  • Sometimes, unsubtle displays of wealth like driving a nice car, bottle service at a club. However these cost money and are not internal characteristics and require no additional social intuition to pull off
  • Sometimes, simply aging well is a signal of elite-ness. The older man has experience and has a sense of wisdom shared by few his age
  • A subtle style difference like a handkerchief in the suit pocket, or a necktie pin

#3 Openness

Openness is the way you wear your clothes that conveys a positive and open energy. This invites people to look at you and even start a conversation with you. Layering is a styling technique we use, and also, over time you will develop stronger openness the more you feel comfortable in your clothes. Openness is usually conveyed with colors, an open stand (lower body) and a straight back and open, wide shoulders. Your face should have a slight smile.

The feeling the man is communicating to women is:

  • I am connected to the world
  • I have what I need to get to where I want to go
  • I am open to meeting and helping others
  • Join me on my journey and let’s create a win-win situation.

#4 Clean Cut

Maintaining your body, grooming and looks is harder than it looks. However, successful male models and good looking people have a beauty routine. Instead of leaving it to chance or habit of human nature (we are lazy by nature) they develop these morning and night routines to keep shaved, clean, and hair trimmed. They even have a going-out and night-out routine, as many “good looking” club girls do. Being clean cut is the most fundamentally important SAS.

The feeling the man is communicating to women is:

  • I take care of myself
  • I value the way I look and take pride in what God has gifted me with
  • I take the time to be with myself and styling my hair is an art
  • I like being clean and keeping things simplistic in my look and my life

Clean cut is expressed in clothing by:

  • Having a slick hairstyle
  • Facial hair and all body hair is always trimmed and in check. Even in the cases of beards, it is kept groomed and looks like it is maintained well
  • Attention to all of the details of a suit, or the way an outfit looks and how each clothing item corresponds to another
  • Paying attention to the little things. Laced tied. Colors match. Shirt is pressed. The devil is in the details.

#5 Congruence

Now that you have the look down, can you add depth to it? Is the character stronger than the clothing items? Congruence refers to the degree of authenticity and matching energy between the outfit and the individual.

The feeling he is communicating to women is:

  • I am who I present myself to be
  • I mean what I say, be it positive or negative
  • You can feel comfortable around me and trust me
  • There’s a history and story behind what you’re seeing on the outside

Lack of the Congruence SAS will reveal you as a wolf in sheep’s clothing

Congruence is expressed in clothing by:

  • Feeling comfortable in your clothing (don’t worry, it may take some time if you are new to adjust to this)
  • Being aware of your body and being present in the moment. Congruence in game = The matching of thought, words, and actions.
  • Playing up the character of the outfit. I.e. A business man sits down with authority, or the way a dancer in a dancing costume may be in a hyped up party mood. Anthropologists have studied tribal warriors who use face paint versus those who do not, and found that the majority of those that did would kill its enemies whereas the ones that did not kept them as prisoners. This is because the face paint is a uniform. When in uniform, individuality erodes and group-think takes hold. Similarly, a person who wears a dancer’s costume may embody part of that style class’s identity. This is exaggerated on Holidays like Halloween.

#6 Adaptability

This SAS refers to the ability to evolve and adapt to a new environment is the key to survival and success in many areas of life. The 3 types of adaptability are: geographical, cultural and personal.

Imagine a well dressed guy in a business suit on a college campus. Would he fit it? What about the goth rocker in a downtown, financial district bar full of investment bankers? Purple may make you look great in Brazil but gay in San Francisco. All of these require adaptation to social and cultural differences. A guy who is adaptable shows social intelligence and this is a huge turn on for women.

The feeling he is communicating to women is:

  • I am who I present myself to be, but I know when it is appropriate to adjust my style to the larger context
  • I understand the underlying social forces that are going on here
  • I get it

In the case he DOESN’T adapt:

  • I know the rules, but you have to know the rules to break the rules
  • I am cool enough to not follow conventional rules

#7 Preselection

The idea behind pre-selection is that women want what other women want.  The quickest way to demonstrate that you’re an attractive guy is to show that other women are attracted to you (that you are pre-selected).

The feeling he is communicating to women is:

  • I am a guy who sees life as in abundance. I have options in life
  • I am the buyer, not the seller
  • If this doesn’t work out it will be ok. Life is abundant

Pre-selection can be expressed in clothing by:

  • A more feminine scent (can be perfume)
  • Slightly feminine accessory that could belong to one of your girlfriends
  • Having female friends around you who enjoy your company and feel safe
  • Having girls fighting over you to take her home at a bar

#8 Lifestyle & Personality Dimensions

The human condition has so many layers and dimensions that make this SAS hard to describe. Dimensions of lifestyle and personality refer to the way a person moves through life. His overall “take on life” and way he travels through his life greatly enhances his style and attraction levels. Specific examples of this are explained in the Way of Attraction and Beyond Style sections in Seduce With Style.

Personality Dimensions is the idea that everyone has a personality matrix. The good girl has a bad slut side to her. The businessman who is funny and have moments of being empathetic (Ari Gold), the hardcore wrestler who is actually quite gentle and nice (Hulk Hogan), the nice quiet guy who ends up being the murderer (i.e. Scary Movie).

Having a lifestyle and understanding one’s personalities communicates to women:

  • I have a strong identity, but it is not set in stone
  • I can make fun of myself because I know that personality is fluid, things change and we all have rationalization of our “self” and how we see ourselves
  • I don’t take myself too seriously
  • I can embrace different parts of my personality
  • You don’t know what to expect. Sometimes I am nice, other times I am alpha. But do know that I will respond appropriately and authentically in all situations.
  • I hangout with OTHER cool people that share my awesome life views

Lifestyle & Personality are expressed in clothing by:

  • The outfit matching the lifestyle stage. Examples: a Salsa dancer at the dance studio, Hugh Hefner at Playboy Mansion, A businessman in a boardroom
  • A group of well dressed rockers who are all part of a band
  • A group of guys who all have their own identities, and when combined create a group vibe and style that is unmatched by others

Now that you know what these 8 switches are, you can begin to learn how to implement them. In the world of infinite designs, colors and clothing items, you now have a fundamental understanding of the forces of Attraction Fashion. For 10 quick tips you can implement today, download the 10 style hacks PDF here.

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